The New Weight Gain 4000

When in the course of human events we Americans find ourselves in need of an additional 30-50 pounds of pure fat to be added to our already-obese soon-to-be carcasses, there exists an industry who is only happy to solve that stretch-mark-inducing need. Today, that industry is the fast-food industry, and that product is Kentucky Fried Chicken's Double Down.

I've made plenty of observations about this nation's greatest achievement, that of the 2,000 calorie snack, on many occasions (here and here, for starters) but this newest of prizes reminds us that too much is never enough. Too much cholesterol, too much fat, too much sodium, too much heart disease, and too much weight. What's an extra 100 pounds anyway? It worked for Henry VIII, why not Middle America?

Click here to be introduced to the sandwich that will put you in your grave.

And be sure to bring your insulin, your Lipitor and your Slimfast with you next time you visit KFC.