Friday, April 25, 2008

Halfway There

Aside from the fact that the sun isn't quite out as of yet, I expect today, Friday, will be a nice day. It's the end of a long, difficult week -- yet another -- and despite the fact Kaia's back in SF and I'm back in NYC, I'm looking forward to the weekend.

It's strange coming home to an empty apartment; more importantly, I wouldn't mind coming home to an empty apartment if I knew she was elsewhere nearby. Knowing she's not within a subway, bus or cab ride's distance is the really shitty part of the whole equation. But given the near future's plans for this summer, knowing this temporary situation is about to change -- for the better, and permanently -- is worth our patience.

In the meantime, I've got shitloads to do since I missed a couple days this week due to the holiday, so I'll probably be buried in paper this weekend. Considering it's supposed to be rainy and bleak, I doubt very much I'll miss running around with my other half. It will definitely be strange not having her around to make me laugh or to make laugh, and even when it's crappy and rainy outside she always manages to make me smile no matter what, so whether it's rainy or beautiful out, not having her there will make the weather sort of inconsequential.

There isn't much news beyond that to address; we've been attempting to settle back into our "normal" routines -- or irregular ones, if you're keeping score -- and both of us have been trying to get sleep and back on the clock vis-a-vis work and life. The problem is that since we're an integral part of one another's lives, that re-emergence is difficult, to say the least. It's a bit like the lyrics from Peter Gabriel's "Washing Of The Water." The song, which comes from his album "Us," is a confession about his break-up with Roseanna Arquette. While we're not broken up, every time she and I part company for a matter of weeks or months, we both sense that same sort of loss inherent in a long absence, which in many ways mirrors a break-up. Of course we don't have the same sense of emotional loss that break-ups incur, but not having your best friend there with you after having her there every minute of every day is jarring and an experience I'm glad to say will soon be coming to an end.

My apologies for today's dark, less-than-uplifting observations; for the most part, it's easy for me to look beyond the half-emptiness of the glass and see it as half-full. And this situation, despite the immediacy thereof, is actually a "half-full" one. However, as of the short term and how we each feel, that glass is half-empty for sure and we both are looking forward to when it's not just half-full but spilling over.

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