Wednesday, February 07, 2007

The Names Change But The Asshole Is Still The Same

The Asshole Du Jour is New York State Sen. Carl Kruger, who actually admitted -- officially -- that today he will propose legislation banning people in New York City proper (that is, Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Bronx and Staten Island) from crossing the street while using an iPod.

Yes, you read right. This moron feels that there have been enough young people killed because they were distracted by iPods, Blackberry devices, PSPs or other portable entertainment devices, cellphones, etc., to warrant a ban against what he feels is rapidly becoming a "major public safety crisis."

It wasn't enough that the State (actually, the Federal Government) advised us that we had to wear seatbelts or we'd be fined. Then they told us we couldn't drive and talk on our cell phones, although plenty of people are so oblivious to the laws that they still do -- and they are awful drivers whether or not they're yapping away about last night's bar activities.

Then they banned trans fat, so even if I want to slowly kill myself by gorging on 21 pounds of KFC a day, I'll need to drive to another state to do so.

And to top it off, I now have to stop at the sidewalk, turn off my iPod and remove my earphones before crossing the street?

When did the state -- or the Federal Government -- become my parent? When did Chuck Schumer, Hilary Clinton or this other shitbird, Kruger, decide to step in and waste his time and mine by sounding off on something so stupid and so ridiculous that if I was his fellow state senator I'd propose we all get in line and give this imbecile each ten kicks in the ass or the head (as if there's a difference). Why do these morons think they can legislate our safety with these silly, convoluted ideas? Ban can openers because a lot of people slip while they're opening their stewed prunes and cut themselves. Or ban the stewed prunes themselves, they cause air pollution. Or ban the factories that make the stewed prunes.

When did Darwin's Theory of Evolution get tossed aside? How is it that a bunch of -- presumably, according to this nimrod Kruger's plan -- dumb people get ahold of iPods and get killed or injured while crossing the street? If you are in possession of an iPod -- whether you got it as a gift, you stole it or you borrowed your Uncle Ned's iPod -- and you could master the click-wheel but couldn't master the art of being careful while crossing the street, you don't need the intervention or the supervision of a state senator; you need a parent, and your parent needs a leash. The Senate -- state or otherwise -- is not a parent, is not a group of parents, and should go back to doing non-parental things, like regulating laws, tax rates, and insuring criminals are behind bars; fining dimwits who can't navigate the street and an iPod simultaneously should not be on the docket.

How about we ban overzealous dingleberry senators who obviously have nothing better to do than waste our time?

Someone get Carl Kruger directions to A Place Called Reality, because he's clearly lost and seems to be having a hard time finding it.

2 comments:

LisaBinDaCity said...

It's so bonehead. He's an idiot.

And if you're groovin' to your iPod, and not smart enough to watch for oncoming traffic, well then you deserve to be hit!

Boogie said...

Ed Zachary.

There's nothing wrong with giving advice to people about not eating unhealthy foods (transfats), wearing your seat belt and making sure you're careful while crossing the street and simultaneously enjoying some sort of portable electronic device. What bothers me is that politicians like Kruger, et al, see fit to impose fines on people who (stupidly though it may be) don't follow good advice. And moreover, what really irritates me -- perhaps even moreso than these aforementioned fines for "non-believers" -- is that Kruger and the other idiots apparently have the time and the willingness to meddle in our daily lives in this way.

A true putz of the First Order.